Closure.

Everyone in their life needs closure. Some people honestly just don't know the truthful meaning to closure. Closure, in my dictionary, means you just need to stop the process, and end everything. Kill all the nerves. I think that James needs to have closure with Bek. He hurts her and I just can't take anymore of it. If Bek can't take anymore of it either, its seriously killing her a lot more. I hate it when Bek gets hurt because shes kinda my bestfriend, ya know?  So to be honest, I would just like to end the whole James, Bek, Relationship friend thing. Its irritating. Bek doesn't even want to talk to James anymore because she wants it to end more than I do. I'm sorry, but when things have gone on for so long and people are getting hurt and have no idea whats going to happen in the future, Its just time to quit. The past is behind us. Not in front of us, or right now. This is seriously so annoying. What seriously pissed me off more than anything was when you said you didn't give a fuck about Bek anymore. THAT WAS FUCKING STUPID. You put sooooo much devotion into her and then you just, BAM! Drop her. No. okay? Nuh uh. That's not what you do when you have loved this girl since 9th grade and now you decide to just forget about her? ONCE AGAIN. She had her own OPINION about your girlfriend. I don't care if it was mean or not. As long as you still love her, that's all that matters. I don't need to be fighting with you about this, but you seriously need to get this through your head. Bek is hurt. You have broken the one girl you never even wanted to hurt. And yet, you keep breaking her. And now you say that shes completely fine with it..? If you think that, you don't even know her at all. Now, don't start arguing with me about this. I'm already sick of my bestfriend getting hurt constantly. The best thing to do right now, is completely let go, and cut the nerves. You need to figure out that Bek loves Dawson now to the full extent, and shes getting over you a little more each day. At the End of The World party, Bek wasn't even thinking about you, until Bob brought you up. And then as soon as we changed the subject Bek's mind left you alone. Please understand that this is how its going to be for now on. You may try to change that, but its not going to work. Bek and I already talked about this and decided that you weren't worth it. Sure, she asked you back out, but to her that seems like she made a huge mistake, and shes starting to regret it knowing that she could have spent her time on someone who was worth it. Bek is tired of your mom calling her horrible names. Its sorta like what Bek said to Kat, huh? Yeah. So don't get mad at Bek because she called Kat a whore. Your mom does the exact same fucking thing. If your going to throw a hissy fit about Bek calling Kat a whore, maybe you should think twice about the way you reacted when your mother did the same thing to Bek. This is ridiculous and everyone's sick of it. Not just Bek and I. If you text her, she won't reply because she knows what might happen if she does. Listen, you know Kat doesn't love you. Shes always got a crush on another guy and its never going to be just you. But that's normal for a girl. Don't get too dedicated and attached because if she breaks your heart, you can't blame us because we just warned you about how much it hurts to be shattered. And this is the only way we are gunna talk to you. Its through the blogs. We know you don't have to reply, we know you may not read it, and its proof for the whole world to see. Be pissed all you fetching want. We could really care less, and this is how Bek and I truly feel.

Okay. So i'm done. Please think about this. k. baii x

xxxx.....Chelsea.....xxxx

The beginning of "Pig-Nose".

Pig-nose.

When I first moved to Rigby, I was 6. I stayed in Idaho Falls school until my parents sent me to school in Rigby in forth grade. I was sad to be leaving Idaho Falls and all of my friends that lived there. I knew from that moment that I wouldn’t be able to talk or see them anymore. I only kept in touch with a few of my Idaho Falls friends because they were closer then others. I missed Idaho Falls, and I still do today. I truly want to move back, but then I’ll miss my Rigby friends. Anyway, my first day in forth grade went well. I already knew a girl there because she was on my softball team. Her name was Paige Beddes. We were pretty good friends since we already knew each other. My forth grade teacher was really nice to us and we played meeting games with everyone on the first day. I met Sariah Campbell that day. She was another one of my best friends for a long time, but she just recently moved to Boise. About half way through the year, I started being bullied. I was called really bad names and wasn’t liking it too much. I just kinda laughed through it most of the time. It was really hard to be bullied, especially at such a young age of 9. It really got bad when people started saying that I had a pig nose. I was so sad and I just wanted to stay home and cry. I didn’t want to go back that next day and have It happen to me again. Have people called me pig nose and a freak. I just wasn’t  up to going to school and being bullied. I’m always really happy when summer comes along because I don’t see the people from school anymore and I don’t get bullied. When I came back all 5th,6th, and 7th grade years, it kept happening. Only it was worse bulling. Its like when I get older, the worse to bulling comes.

You shout it loud, but I can't hear a word you sayI'm talking loud, not saying muchI'm criticized, but all your bullets ricochetyou shoot me down, but I get up
I'm bulletproof, nothing to losefire away, fire awayricochet, you take your aimfire away, fire awayyou shoot me down, but I won't fallI am titaniumyou shoot me down, but I won't fallI am titanium
Cut me down, but it's you who'll have further to fallGhost town and haunted loveRaise your voice, sticks and stones may break my bonesI'm talking loud, not saying much
I'm bulletproof, nothing to losefire away, fire awayricochet, you take your aimfire away, fire away
you shoot me down, but I won't fallI am titaniumyou shoot me down, but I won't fallI am titanium
I am titanium
I am titanium
Stone hard, machine gunFired at the ones who runStone hard, as bulletproof glass
You shoot me down, but I won't fallI am titaniumYou shoot me down, but I won't fallI am titaniumYou shoot me down, but I won't fallI am titaniumYou shoot me down, but I won't fallI am titanium
.......♥

I really don't care what you guys say about me being so rude to James. Sure, In your eyes, I was mean, but in my eyes, I was truthful. and Sometimes, the truth hurts. Don't just cradle the people you love in your arms like a little baby to try to keep them safe forever... Drop them.Just like all your problems in life, you will have to drop them sooner or later. Don't be so coy about everything either. Its not attractive. and neither is jealousy. 

In this day and age, if your under the age of 18, You have no idea what love is. If you think you do, you don't. I hope every single girl in this world gets their heart broken because girls need that type of hurt to know what love is and who will hurt her and who will not. When elementary school kids talk about getting married and being in love, its cute. But when Middle School through High School do it, its just stupid. YOU CAN'T BE IN LOVE IN THIS DAY AND AGE. GET IT THROUGH YOUR HEAD. I understand that this blog hurts people, but again. Don't drop people after you "love them" and you put so much devotion into them and then just say you don't give a fuck anymore. That just means your not worthy of that person.


Thats my story. and I'm sticking to it.


Shout-outs of the day; 

Melissa Scott; You are the bestest ever. I lahve you. :33

Rebekah Phillips; Stay strong <3

Jacob (James) Arnie Espinoza Beckett; I love youuu. Your amazing and even though you live in Jersey, I will love you :33

Shut up.

Okay. Most of you know by now that I COMPLETELY blew up on James yesterday. It was the right thing to do though. Sure. Rebekah is my Bestfriend  but that's not why. I was being truthful. Not a bitch. I was only trying to get through to everyone that if you work really hard to love someone, keep the devotion to them. Don't just forget about them. If you say you don't give a fuck anymore, you are completely wrong and need to SHUT THE HELL UP. You work really hard to see her and to get her to love you back, but if you get a girlfriend and that girl has a OPINION about her, don't just forget about her completely.  I stood up for Bek yesterday because I have been through ALL OF THIS. I tell the truth. I may be harsh, but its only because I try to get through to people and try to make them think long and hard about what I had said. I felt bad when you walked by me with a frown on your face today JAMES. It literally BROKE MAH HEART. But if that's what it takes to get things through your face and mind. then shall be it. I try not to be mean, but when things happen like that and people have their own opinions, I try to help them as much as possible..

Song of the day; If you cant hang- Sleeping With Sirens

i chose this song because if you can't hang then, theres the door baby.

If you make promises, keep them.

I want everyone who reads this to learn something. if you make a promise to someone you care about, keep it or something bad is going to happen. i only care about you guys. But something happened today that i just can't stop being royaly pissed about. so i'll just do it on shout outs.

First off; 

James Facer. 

Okay. wtf. i know that i'm being a royal bish but i hate what you have done to bek ever since you guys have met. You have broken all your promises to her and its not funny anymore. it never was funny. all it does is hurt bek. Remember when you said " i dont ever want to hurt her." well, you have. its seriously ridiculous how much you fall for bek and then just say you dgaf anymore. you have worked so hard towards having her as a friend and you just broke it. she had her opinon about your girlfriend. let her have it. everyone deserves their own opinion and to say what they want. im sorry. but its true.

Rebekah Phillips; I already talked to you about this over the phone and don't feel like typing it. Just know I love you and have your bsck through evrything

Now the better shoutouts of the day(: 

Alex Peralta; you are amazing and i love your personality(: 

Grace Richmond; do i really have to say something? your my bestestfriednever. (:

alright. so that was my story and im sticking to it.

~~~xx..

The Christmas Party! :DD

Okay, so Friday. Best. Day. Evarrr. xD

Okay, so i was really excited about seeing Kyle because well.. hes the only kid I know. lol. So I went to the party, and at first i was sooo awkward. So I went up to Kali and we started talking.

Me; Hey.
Kali; Hi! Haven't seen you in a while!
Me; Yeah, I know.. You probably forgot my name.

and then I met Haley. and then omgomgomg. I met MATTHEW. Oh my god. he walked up to us and Kali was like "And then there's Matthew. So now we're not to only ones with braces here at the party." I said Hey. and Matthew was different. He wasn't like a normal guy that just said "hey." He actually asked what my name was. I smiled of course and said "Chelsea". After that we started talking and Matthew went to go talk to his mom. I asked Kali & Haley to ask Matt what he thought of me. Of course, me being 13, and him being 15, I would just thought he would have thought of me as a stupid kid. BUT NOPE :D He said this. "Shes beautiful, and if she was my girlfriend, I'd be all over her." I smiled really big.(:  So we went downstairs to Kali's room, and we all took off our shoes and layed on Kali's bed, but Matthew sat on the floor, back to the wall.I decided to roll of the bed onto the floor because the carpet was really soft. I fell off and Matt called me a goofball.(: I sat by him and then I tazered him and he tickled me. We were really hitting it off! Later Dr. Greenwald(Kali's dad) wanted us to go upstairs and mingle with everyone. I was up there for like... 5 minutes, then me and Matt went downstairs. We played tag and he tagged me so I fell on the floor and called it "base". haha(: We just sat downstairs and talked about school until the girls came downstairs. Later we just sat and then I decided to steal his phone and text Kali with it. I sent "omgomgomg I love Chelsea(:" and also " shes amazing(: " and Kali just laughed. and so I hid it and he layed over me and hes all like " Kiss?" and so we kissed<3 It was amazing. and I gave him back his phone. Later he had his arm over me and his mom came down and he had to leave. So he went upstairs and before he did, We kissed again. He has the most amazingest kiss ever :D So after the party we left and I thought about the kiss all night and all Saturday and all today. I love Matthew Goriup. #Iloveyousososososomuch. <3
So I asked him today what his favorite part about the party and he did the winky face ;) It was my favorite part too! :DD

Song of the day; Kiss you; One Direction. I wonder why that's the song.(:

Shoutout of the day;  Matthew. Duhh. Hes amazing. I think that he is the cutest guy ever.and the Best Kisser ever. just pointing that out.

:D

~..x..Chelsea..x..~