Closure.

Everyone in their life needs closure. Some people honestly just don't know the truthful meaning to closure. Closure, in my dictionary, means you just need to stop the process, and end everything. Kill all the nerves. I think that James needs to have closure with Bek. He hurts her and I just can't take anymore of it. If Bek can't take anymore of it either, its seriously killing her a lot more. I hate it when Bek gets hurt because shes kinda my bestfriend, ya know?  So to be honest, I would just like to end the whole James, Bek, Relationship friend thing. Its irritating. Bek doesn't even want to talk to James anymore because she wants it to end more than I do. I'm sorry, but when things have gone on for so long and people are getting hurt and have no idea whats going to happen in the future, Its just time to quit. The past is behind us. Not in front of us, or right now. This is seriously so annoying. What seriously pissed me off more than anything was when you said you didn't give a fuck about Bek anymore. THAT WAS FUCKING STUPID. You put sooooo much devotion into her and then you just, BAM! Drop her. No. okay? Nuh uh. That's not what you do when you have loved this girl since 9th grade and now you decide to just forget about her? ONCE AGAIN. She had her own OPINION about your girlfriend. I don't care if it was mean or not. As long as you still love her, that's all that matters. I don't need to be fighting with you about this, but you seriously need to get this through your head. Bek is hurt. You have broken the one girl you never even wanted to hurt. And yet, you keep breaking her. And now you say that shes completely fine with it..? If you think that, you don't even know her at all. Now, don't start arguing with me about this. I'm already sick of my bestfriend getting hurt constantly. The best thing to do right now, is completely let go, and cut the nerves. You need to figure out that Bek loves Dawson now to the full extent, and shes getting over you a little more each day. At the End of The World party, Bek wasn't even thinking about you, until Bob brought you up. And then as soon as we changed the subject Bek's mind left you alone. Please understand that this is how its going to be for now on. You may try to change that, but its not going to work. Bek and I already talked about this and decided that you weren't worth it. Sure, she asked you back out, but to her that seems like she made a huge mistake, and shes starting to regret it knowing that she could have spent her time on someone who was worth it. Bek is tired of your mom calling her horrible names. Its sorta like what Bek said to Kat, huh? Yeah. So don't get mad at Bek because she called Kat a whore. Your mom does the exact same fucking thing. If your going to throw a hissy fit about Bek calling Kat a whore, maybe you should think twice about the way you reacted when your mother did the same thing to Bek. This is ridiculous and everyone's sick of it. Not just Bek and I. If you text her, she won't reply because she knows what might happen if she does. Listen, you know Kat doesn't love you. Shes always got a crush on another guy and its never going to be just you. But that's normal for a girl. Don't get too dedicated and attached because if she breaks your heart, you can't blame us because we just warned you about how much it hurts to be shattered. And this is the only way we are gunna talk to you. Its through the blogs. We know you don't have to reply, we know you may not read it, and its proof for the whole world to see. Be pissed all you fetching want. We could really care less, and this is how Bek and I truly feel.

Okay. So i'm done. Please think about this. k. baii x

xxxx.....Chelsea.....xxxx

The beginning of "Pig-Nose".

Pig-nose.

When I first moved to Rigby, I was 6. I stayed in Idaho Falls school until my parents sent me to school in Rigby in forth grade. I was sad to be leaving Idaho Falls and all of my friends that lived there. I knew from that moment that I wouldn’t be able to talk or see them anymore. I only kept in touch with a few of my Idaho Falls friends because they were closer then others. I missed Idaho Falls, and I still do today. I truly want to move back, but then I’ll miss my Rigby friends. Anyway, my first day in forth grade went well. I already knew a girl there because she was on my softball team. Her name was Paige Beddes. We were pretty good friends since we already knew each other. My forth grade teacher was really nice to us and we played meeting games with everyone on the first day. I met Sariah Campbell that day. She was another one of my best friends for a long time, but she just recently moved to Boise. About half way through the year, I started being bullied. I was called really bad names and wasn’t liking it too much. I just kinda laughed through it most of the time. It was really hard to be bullied, especially at such a young age of 9. It really got bad when people started saying that I had a pig nose. I was so sad and I just wanted to stay home and cry. I didn’t want to go back that next day and have It happen to me again. Have people called me pig nose and a freak. I just wasn’t  up to going to school and being bullied. I’m always really happy when summer comes along because I don’t see the people from school anymore and I don’t get bullied. When I came back all 5th,6th, and 7th grade years, it kept happening. Only it was worse bulling. Its like when I get older, the worse to bulling comes.

You shout it loud, but I can't hear a word you sayI'm talking loud, not saying muchI'm criticized, but all your bullets ricochetyou shoot me down, but I get up
I'm bulletproof, nothing to losefire away, fire awayricochet, you take your aimfire away, fire awayyou shoot me down, but I won't fallI am titaniumyou shoot me down, but I won't fallI am titanium
Cut me down, but it's you who'll have further to fallGhost town and haunted loveRaise your voice, sticks and stones may break my bonesI'm talking loud, not saying much
I'm bulletproof, nothing to losefire away, fire awayricochet, you take your aimfire away, fire away
you shoot me down, but I won't fallI am titaniumyou shoot me down, but I won't fallI am titanium
I am titanium
I am titanium
Stone hard, machine gunFired at the ones who runStone hard, as bulletproof glass
You shoot me down, but I won't fallI am titaniumYou shoot me down, but I won't fallI am titaniumYou shoot me down, but I won't fallI am titaniumYou shoot me down, but I won't fallI am titanium
.......♥

I really don't care what you guys say about me being so rude to James. Sure, In your eyes, I was mean, but in my eyes, I was truthful. and Sometimes, the truth hurts. Don't just cradle the people you love in your arms like a little baby to try to keep them safe forever... Drop them.Just like all your problems in life, you will have to drop them sooner or later. Don't be so coy about everything either. Its not attractive. and neither is jealousy. 

In this day and age, if your under the age of 18, You have no idea what love is. If you think you do, you don't. I hope every single girl in this world gets their heart broken because girls need that type of hurt to know what love is and who will hurt her and who will not. When elementary school kids talk about getting married and being in love, its cute. But when Middle School through High School do it, its just stupid. YOU CAN'T BE IN LOVE IN THIS DAY AND AGE. GET IT THROUGH YOUR HEAD. I understand that this blog hurts people, but again. Don't drop people after you "love them" and you put so much devotion into them and then just say you don't give a fuck anymore. That just means your not worthy of that person.


Thats my story. and I'm sticking to it.


Shout-outs of the day; 

Melissa Scott; You are the bestest ever. I lahve you. :33

Rebekah Phillips; Stay strong <3

Jacob (James) Arnie Espinoza Beckett; I love youuu. Your amazing and even though you live in Jersey, I will love you :33

Shut up.

Okay. Most of you know by now that I COMPLETELY blew up on James yesterday. It was the right thing to do though. Sure. Rebekah is my Bestfriend  but that's not why. I was being truthful. Not a bitch. I was only trying to get through to everyone that if you work really hard to love someone, keep the devotion to them. Don't just forget about them. If you say you don't give a fuck anymore, you are completely wrong and need to SHUT THE HELL UP. You work really hard to see her and to get her to love you back, but if you get a girlfriend and that girl has a OPINION about her, don't just forget about her completely.  I stood up for Bek yesterday because I have been through ALL OF THIS. I tell the truth. I may be harsh, but its only because I try to get through to people and try to make them think long and hard about what I had said. I felt bad when you walked by me with a frown on your face today JAMES. It literally BROKE MAH HEART. But if that's what it takes to get things through your face and mind. then shall be it. I try not to be mean, but when things happen like that and people have their own opinions, I try to help them as much as possible..

Song of the day; If you cant hang- Sleeping With Sirens

i chose this song because if you can't hang then, theres the door baby.

If you make promises, keep them.

I want everyone who reads this to learn something. if you make a promise to someone you care about, keep it or something bad is going to happen. i only care about you guys. But something happened today that i just can't stop being royaly pissed about. so i'll just do it on shout outs.

First off; 

James Facer. 

Okay. wtf. i know that i'm being a royal bish but i hate what you have done to bek ever since you guys have met. You have broken all your promises to her and its not funny anymore. it never was funny. all it does is hurt bek. Remember when you said " i dont ever want to hurt her." well, you have. its seriously ridiculous how much you fall for bek and then just say you dgaf anymore. you have worked so hard towards having her as a friend and you just broke it. she had her opinon about your girlfriend. let her have it. everyone deserves their own opinion and to say what they want. im sorry. but its true.

Rebekah Phillips; I already talked to you about this over the phone and don't feel like typing it. Just know I love you and have your bsck through evrything

Now the better shoutouts of the day(: 

Alex Peralta; you are amazing and i love your personality(: 

Grace Richmond; do i really have to say something? your my bestestfriednever. (:

alright. so that was my story and im sticking to it.

~~~xx..

The Christmas Party! :DD

Okay, so Friday. Best. Day. Evarrr. xD

Okay, so i was really excited about seeing Kyle because well.. hes the only kid I know. lol. So I went to the party, and at first i was sooo awkward. So I went up to Kali and we started talking.

Me; Hey.
Kali; Hi! Haven't seen you in a while!
Me; Yeah, I know.. You probably forgot my name.

and then I met Haley. and then omgomgomg. I met MATTHEW. Oh my god. he walked up to us and Kali was like "And then there's Matthew. So now we're not to only ones with braces here at the party." I said Hey. and Matthew was different. He wasn't like a normal guy that just said "hey." He actually asked what my name was. I smiled of course and said "Chelsea". After that we started talking and Matthew went to go talk to his mom. I asked Kali & Haley to ask Matt what he thought of me. Of course, me being 13, and him being 15, I would just thought he would have thought of me as a stupid kid. BUT NOPE :D He said this. "Shes beautiful, and if she was my girlfriend, I'd be all over her." I smiled really big.(:  So we went downstairs to Kali's room, and we all took off our shoes and layed on Kali's bed, but Matthew sat on the floor, back to the wall.I decided to roll of the bed onto the floor because the carpet was really soft. I fell off and Matt called me a goofball.(: I sat by him and then I tazered him and he tickled me. We were really hitting it off! Later Dr. Greenwald(Kali's dad) wanted us to go upstairs and mingle with everyone. I was up there for like... 5 minutes, then me and Matt went downstairs. We played tag and he tagged me so I fell on the floor and called it "base". haha(: We just sat downstairs and talked about school until the girls came downstairs. Later we just sat and then I decided to steal his phone and text Kali with it. I sent "omgomgomg I love Chelsea(:" and also " shes amazing(: " and Kali just laughed. and so I hid it and he layed over me and hes all like " Kiss?" and so we kissed<3 It was amazing. and I gave him back his phone. Later he had his arm over me and his mom came down and he had to leave. So he went upstairs and before he did, We kissed again. He has the most amazingest kiss ever :D So after the party we left and I thought about the kiss all night and all Saturday and all today. I love Matthew Goriup. #Iloveyousososososomuch. <3
So I asked him today what his favorite part about the party and he did the winky face ;) It was my favorite part too! :DD

Song of the day; Kiss you; One Direction. I wonder why that's the song.(:

Shoutout of the day;  Matthew. Duhh. Hes amazing. I think that he is the cutest guy ever.and the Best Kisser ever. just pointing that out.

:D

~..x..Chelsea..x..~

Yeah. I'm sick of getting called out of class EVERY SINGLE hour.

Alright. So.
Lets just start off with I'm pretty much pissed.
I'm sick of Phebe Murray and Mandi Thornton getting mad at me and Bek for something we clearly didn't do. I mean.. I could have CLEARLY avoided talking to Mandi, but I just needed to tell her that she looks way bad when she cheats. So, Phebe comes up to me and decides to be like;
"Hey, so uh. You need to shut the fuck up and stop spreading fucking lies. You need to fucking knock it off before I knock you out."

And I'm just sitting at the table with Mary and all my other friends because Bek left with Dawson to the Choir room as usual, and Phebe just comes out of no where and says that to me.. I'm just like.. uh. K. Bye Bitch. I seriously am sick of her and her lies because she said I supposedly hit her in the cafeteria bathroom in the morning? Uh. No. So I went down to the vice-principal and talked to him. He had Kyle Horman call me down and I as I walked out of the choir class he stared at me and smiled and said "Ya know, those green slips are bad." I was smiling like NO OTHER. I seriously. like. LOVE Kyle. He just has that face and that personalty.<3 Anywayyy. I walk in and I told the V.P.(Vice Principal) about everything that had happened that day and he said he would talk to Phebe, Bek and me about it more later. So while the next week came around I had totally forgotten about that day and just carried on my normal life (Oh yeah.. NORMAL. *Sarcasm*) until I got called in AGAIN. I was already nervous because I was thinking about if Phebe was going to be in there too.. What was I going to do if she threw a punch? Just sit there and deal with it? Well. I imagined I would because if I went through cutting for 6 months, I could go through one little punch. Those 20 seconds down that hall were terrible. Everything was going through my mind at once. As I knocked on the V.P's door, I walked in to see the nice resource officer there. I seriously think shes GORGEOUS<3 Shes so purdy. xDD Anywayy. I sat down and I went through to whole story again.. I was a little nervous because she was just sitting there making notes and staring at me.. I lost my train of thought about 20 times and I wasn't done with my story until 5 minutes later when he said to stop. He then said that I hit Phebe in the bathroom that morning. uh. again. NO. So I replied with a smart ass attitude and said " Oh Yeah. I hit Phebe." I wasn't trying to. It was just my intention to. I was so blown away that I couldn't have even believed that she said that.

I pretty much hated this whole week because day after day after day I was called out of classes and missed important lessons and none of it would have ever happened if I wouldn't have had gotten into it. I am so snotty sometimes its ridiculous.

But anyway. I think I'm going to start doing what Rebekah Phillips is doing (lilmissepic.blogspot.com) and do a song and shoutout of the day..(:

So. Song of the day is; *Cue epic drum music*

I would- One Direction
I chose this song because Its didicated to my shoutout of the day,
Jacob Beckett.

Yeah. I love him(:

Thank you guys for reading<3 x

When I fall, I fall hard.

Monday to today have been the bestest days of my life. Yes. I said bestest. Get over it.

I have been talking to Jacob more and more lately, and we have decided that hes coming to the "potato state" when he gets his licence. In 3 years I might actually get to see the love of my life. Yes, I know I'm only 13, and its weird to be thinking of this, but he has promised me so many things. He broke up with his girlfriend because of me.. He's staying single until he finally meets me. I'm have to say. I'm happy about it(: Hes an "Overly Attached Boyfriend" See this picture?

His friend asked him how he would have sex with me, and he showed him on a bean bag chair (I worry about him sometimes.) and then he kicked it aside and his friend said "WHY'D YOU KICK CHELSEA YOU ABUSIVE SICK FUCK?!" I laughed sooo hard xD


Okayy...
I gotta go. A STORMS A COMIN.
~Chelseaa xx

November 11th,2012

I'm so tired right now.. I stayed up watching Bo Burnham and eating candy yesterday and now I'm just tired. So, I decided to draw the Tumblr. Sign and I'm still working on it.

I'm having a few problems.. with money. and crushes D}:
My money troubles are with Christmas coming up, and painting my room... I'm planning on painting my room teal before February of 2013. I have to save up at least half of my money so that I can pay my dad when he does it. I also need money for Christmas presents..

My crushes are all over the place. Theres so many..
But one in particular. Jacob Beckett.
hes a boy from Dover that make me smilee<3

I can't get over what he sent to me..
He said this; 
Hey, Chelsea, by the time you read this, i'm sound asleep, i wish you the sweetest dreams and a good night. I'll talk to you tomorrow, i promise i won't forget to message you. Love you <3

I was so happy :)
I promised him that when I met him, we would be bestfriends forever, and get married and have pony children(: Just saying.

Okay, so this may be offensive to Bek, But Mandi Thornton is sooo mean. Shes also a HUGE cheater. Had a fight with her today and cheating makes you look bad, Just saying. Oh, and alllll of those pictures? Your not being "hot" Your being a slut.
Again, I'm sorry Bek.. I love you, but its my opinion about her..


I tried to find my bestfriend, Alexandra Ogden, on facebook today. Nope. Nothing. I miss her so much. I haven't seen her since I moved to a Rigby school... I often think about what it would be like to go back and enroll in Clair E. Gale or Eagle Rock.. I don't know. I learned that I start getting my collage credits this year.. and I need 50. So. YAY(: I'm pretty happy.(:

I'm not happy about me not being in Choir for the rest of the year. I'm pissed and sad that I can't see Burrows anymore after this tri... )''':
Stupid Yearbook..

Well. My blog has changed because I added fontssss. I like it(: Okay. Well, I better go mozy off to bed and dream about cats and dogs getting along.
Goodnight,
~Chelsea. x

November 10th, 2012.

Sorry I didn't post yesterday! I got a little busy with watching "The Hangover" and drinking vitamin water..
teehee(:
Anywayy!!
I went to Zumba and I sware, I looked like a DIEING WHALE while I worked out. I haven't gone to Zumba in over 6 months ): Well, my grandpa is stranded in the woods (his cabin) in Island Park because his truck broke down.. So hes there for a week until someone can get it fixed. Thats pretty sad.. We were COMPLETELY dead at the Veterans Day Assembly. We weren't as loud as we should have been, and we could have sand more tall.. I heard a few "eee" voices. But other then that, it was pretty good. Juan picked me up and carried me like 578341 times. So that was fun... I tried tackling Krista.. It didn't work out very well... I still LOVE spooning and tackling Bek though(:

Awwh. Bek Shes my bestfriend<3
Shes one of my inspirations for EVERYTHING(: Yes, even that.
I love that I can talk to her about anything and I was almost crying tears of joy when I heard she wasen't moving :)

Me and her have been such great friends!! I love her sooooo much!!!

Bek has been so amazing and I enjoy every minute with her<33

November 8, 2012.

First day of blogging. okay. Lets just start off with that I love you for looking at my blog. You have now made me smile.(: So thankss!(:
About 2 days ago I got told that my Best Friend in the whole world is moving. I don't care where shes moving. Either its Korea or Rexberg, I will miss her with all my heart and I break out into tears whenever I think of it..

I love my "Husband", James(: 
Hes freaking amazing! I can't ever go to Zumba with him. Makes me soo mad.
Everyone thinks its so creepy that I always hug him :P

Anywayyy.
Zach asked me out yesterday and I said yes... I wanna break-up with him now. I wanna ethier go out with Bo Burnham, or Juan. idk :/ Colton likes me I think.. weirdd..(:

Anyway, I will end my blogs with quotes from things I LOVE(:

"Bek will always be my #1 and my mom is my mom..."
-James Facer.

(Tomorrow; Rebekah<3)